For those of you who don't know what that title means, you have never been to the eye doctor. For those of you that are not blessed with eagle eyes like Jeff has, and have near blindness (like I used to have before Laser Eye Surgery last year) you will know exactly what that means....
BETTER
Today is better emotionally for us. We are functioning at normal again. The kids got 3 square meals today, Liam got his diaper changed in a timely manner and I brushed my teeth for the first time before 4pm. I am focusing on keeping busy and functional. I even called Starbucks to tell them I am ready to ease back into work, I will start with one day next Saturday, I can't wait. I took Bethany to buy her school supplies and pick out her first day of school outfit (a cute butterfly embroidered capri pant with a matching peach and white flower and butterfly top, I will post pictures after her first day) I have been working on a ton of building stuff for our new house. I don't think I even mentioned to you all that on Monday our general contractor was fired (feel free to insert laugh here, I did) We are using a builder and they are scrambling to use the rest of the staff to replace him. Frankly, we have almost been our own general contractor on this job, so I forwarded all my info to the builder to have them pick up where the other guy left off. It has been a nice distraction in all that.
{insert whisper here} perhaps God knew that I would need to be this involved and the delays would need to happen for my emotional healing and sense of contribution as well as seeing something being built while I felt torn down.
WORSE
I woke up last night (about 4 am) with the worst headache I've ever had in my life, no exaggeration. It was clear to me that it was a sinus headache and immediately I knew that the perfect storm of my low white blood cell count window and the kids colds that have had in the last week and merged together in my head. I will confess that I am a huge medicator. I love cold medicine and don't completely understand why everyone doesn't use the huge arsenol of cold meds available as soon as symptoms hit. Unfortunately, as long as I'm on chemo I can't take ANYTHING, including the basics like Tylenol without Dr.'s approval. There are a couple of reasons for this. First, some of them don't react well with the chemo drugs, or may cause my blood to thin (this is not good) but the other major reason is because drugs can mask deeper issues. If I take Tylenol for a simple headache it may mask the life threatening fever that lies beneath. If I get a bad cold or even worse flu at this time it could very easily land me in the hospital. So, knowing this I wrestled in my bed and then spent an hour in the bathroom trying all the old school techniques, warm compress, steam, etc. Nothing worked consistently and certainly not in a way that allowed me to get any sleep. Finally, when the pain was bad enough that I thought I would vomit, I woke up Jeff. He plugged in the heating pad for me and I literally slept with it on low on my face for the next hour. When I woke up I stumbled to phone, I must have looked like a hung-over college student, and called the Dr.
I begged him for some drugs. He talked with the "others" (it must be the same people they talk about in 'Lost'--if you don't watch that show, you won't get that comment) and they had me take my temp several times. When they were convinced that I was fever free they allowed me to take 2 tylenol and an allergy med (Claridin) which Jeff had to go out and get me. AFter two hours I felt like a new woman and went about the rest of my day feeling like I had a cold, but relatively normal.
ABOUT THE SAME
We called Walt last night. He is still in Atlanta, layed up from surgery. He is admittedly in pain, and not anxious to move, let alone sit in a car for 6 hours, anytime soon. He was, of course, in his usual good spirits and I chuckled that the majority of the conversation was spent telling Jeff some changes he wanted on his web site. They are scheduled to return home on friday. We will keep you updated on all this.
Thank you for your prayers, hopes, wishes and emails. Keep sending the funny, quirky and interesting, I think that has helped me turn the corner in the last few days....no...I know it has.
Kat
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
2 comments:
Dear Kat,
We have never met but my cousin Norman Paul Felty sent me your blog address. He and his wife Sue were neighbors of your mother and father. Paul's mother,my dear aunt Jeanne had breast cancer as well as her mother Sophie, my grandmother, my mother and I an a 6 year survivor. My cancer was invasive ductal and was also in the lymph. Today I am still in remission. I just met a young lady at the doctors office when I had my check up who was terrified and preparing to beginning her first treatments. I was able to encourage her. I was so happy when she took me up on my offer to call me if she needed to talk and needed someone she wasn't close to that she could sue as a sounding board who'd been there!
I think you are very brave to use bloggin to share with others, get things off your chest, as well as encouraging feed back. I would be careful about personal information though. There are a lot of crazy people out there.
I am so encouraged every year by all the progress made in treating breast cancer. I was in 3 different studies. One was the sentinal node biopsy. I was one of the first 25 in Dallas to have it done.
I do understand the need for laughs. I had to put my parents in assisted living while I was undergoing my treatments. One of the hardest things I ever had to do.
I would call my kids up and say tell me every thing the grandkids said and did today and I would laugh my head off. I had 7 and they ranged in age from pre teen to babies. SH
Rose Colored glasses for you. That is what you need. Then the worse will be better and never will you see the same again.
I am sitting here on Pohick Rd on my front porch after watering all of my plants. As I pulled that long hose across the front yard I heard a memory from the past. Red light, Green light. I had taught the kids that game in the front yard. I hardly ever let them play in the front yard because of the road, however, after dinner we would go on the porch and play Mother May I, Red Light, Green Light, and I made up a game My car, Your car. The front lawn has really shrunk after 30 years here in that we have filled it with lush plants that have survived this year's heat. So as I water the plants it is so quiet and still. I find myself just listening for those good memories. Laughter, lightning bugs, thousands of leaves to be raked and piles to be jumped in and snow. You should have seen the 7 foot snow men the kids built one winter on Pohick Road. I am not half the writer that Kathleen is, but she asked for some good things. Like raindrops on roses, and whiskers on kittens, so maybe you can share some memories with Kathleen, it just takes a few minutes to be still and remember.
Red light green light, Mother May I,
Yes you may!!!!!!!!!!!!
Post a Comment